Murakh-ji talks to the Security-Wallah

Recently Murakh-ji was talking to a security-wallah (SW) about thefts
on campus.

    "When a theft occurs, what is the role of security?" asked Murakh-ji.
    "Role? What role? We have no role in most thefts." he said. 
    "No role at all?" Murakh-ji persisted.
    The SW (security-wallah) frowned through his heavy moustache and
growled like a cornered cat, "Mostly not. I told you once, didn't I?"
    "But," protested Murakh-ji, "Are you not supposed to catch the thief?"
    
An air of relaxation wafted through the SW's drawn cheeks. 

    "Oh -- that role!!" he laughed. He guffawed. And then he laughed a
third time, re-enjoying the joke thoroughly. "Of course, we have a
role in catching the thief! We catch them all the time!!" And he burst
out laughing again.
    "Ah!" said Murakh-ji, not getting the joke. "But what 'role' were
you thinking of? I did not mean that you were actually supposed to
prevent the theft, did I?"
    "On no, no, no, no, .... don't get me wrong, we also have a role
in that, I suppose.", he said thoughtfully, twirling the point of his
moustache and chewing on his paan.  "That's why we post so many
security everywhere. If we were not protecting the campus, there would
have been far fewer thefts!"
    "Far fewer thefts?" exclaimed Murakh-ji!
    "NoNoNo - I meant 'many more thefts' obviously. Just a slip. Of
course, we have to be very careful about our area," he said.
    "And what is 'area'?" asked Murakh-ji.
    "You see, each of us has an 'area.'  If I see a thief, I have to
first see what was his 'area'. For example, if I am not sure he stole
from the very window I was looking at, he is not from my 'area' and I
don't bother with him. Hazzar questions is all that comes to. More
faltu jhamela, you see!!"
    "But if there is a theft, isn't there jhamela?" asked Murakh-ji.
    "What jhamela? Some forum-shorum it shouts into hot air, some
head's meeting it produces pieces of paper, but no one bothers me. I
keep looking at the same window, and end of month, I get my tankha,
you see! Why get into jhut-jhamela!"

Murakh-ji felt like the man had some very solid arguments for all his
actions. He enquired what they did with the thieves they did catch.
   "Oh, we beat them up and warn them very seriously never to do it again.
We are particularly strict if we had caught them earlier as well."
   "Hmmm. That should be quite effective, shouldn't it. I am quite scared
of getting beaten up," Murakh-ji admitted.
   "Of course!! They are too. Some of them plead with us to beat them up
and not to hand them over to the Police. Those guys beat them up even worse, 
you see."
   "But don't the Police also lodge FIR's, try them in court, send them
to prison, etc.?" asked Murakh-ji.
   "Oh those things!! They don't scare them." said the
security-wallah, with a condescending air. "And where do you think
those brother-in-law are going to find the evidence to put them in
prison? They don't have the himmat to get it from us, do you know?" He
glared.
   "But ... but ... aren't you supposed to provide the evidence?" asked
Murakh-ji. 
   "Provide? You mean for free? What is in it for us, my friend? Why
should we do the hard work and let them get all the promotions,
hanh!!"  and he vehemently spat out a slug of Paan, as if spitting on
the very idea.

Murakh-ji was very impressed by this act and the solid intellect behind it.
   "All right," he asked. "What about your role in finding the lost
items after the theft." 
   "Finding the lost item? Why should we? They are not our lost items,
are they?" asked SW, quite indignantly. "It's the person's
responsibility to find his lost things.  If you lose your umbrella on
the bus, why should we try to find it!"
   "But, but...." Murakh-ji stammered, "Isn't it supposed to be part of
the security function."
    SW only glowered.
    "All right, all right. I was just thinking -- maybe that's how it
is abroad. In India, obviously, we have to find our own lost stuff
ourselves.  Of course - the other day Mr Aftab managed to find his
lost scooter himself didn't he! And it was within the campus itself!
And someone of course happened to find Mr. Sinha his lost car!!
YesYesYes you are right of course." Murakh-ji nodded, understanding
finally dawning on him.
    SW smiled condescendingly. 
	
    The sun was setting crimson in the western sky. Silhouetted on his
rooftop, Murakh-ji saw a man running with a large cloth bundle. 
    "Lovely sunset" said SW.
    Murakh-ji stood awestruck at the man's majestic intellect.